The Azerothian Art Attack

This is Lylobean and when she’s not picking pockets she can be found moonlighting as an Art Thief.

Inspired by posts by Tome and Navi on the art of Azeroth, she’d like to show you her highlights of the art world.

Based on the famous painting American Gothic this little number can be found hanging on several Forsaken walls. Unfortunately they don’t take too kindly to Gnomes popping in to admire their art and neither it seems are they too keen on dusting so watch out for giant spiders. Also if you’re Gnome sized, you’ll need a crate, ladder or box because they insist on hanging everything just out of reach.

Language differences aside, screaming is a bad thing in the art business. Don’t stick around to see whether they’re screaming at you or the giant creepy crawly who lives in the cobwebs. Grab and go!

Sticking with the Forsaken for a bit, I also like these landscapes.

Ideally you want paintings which appeal to multiple markets. For example with this one you draw the attention of  two sorts of nostalgia, the Forsaken who want a memory of home as they head off to foreign shores plus the Humans who want to retake Lordaeron.

Property is usually a good seller too, even if the owner of said property is technically dead.

Although besides these dour Forsaken scenes, I have to admit I’m not a great landscape person. The only other one I make an exception  for is this beauty. As with most things, the fact that the subject is now under several feet of water has dramatically increased the value of this painting (and it’s fifty thousand forgeries).

And yes, the forgery market has even reached Twilight Highlands.

The Dark Iron Dwarves also do a nice number in understated and simple paintings. Specialising in chiaroscuro, their work is both eye-catching and unique.

They do have a bad habit of literally bolting them to the walls though, which is probably why their work isn’t found in every Inn but with a bit of persistence, some slight of hand and a willingness to pretend to be a Twilight supporter whilst you unscrew it, it too can be yours.

The prize for down right creepy art however has to go to the artists of Gilneas.

Spot the difference between these two images.

The lengths some people go to prevent the “borrowing” and “mass reproducing” of their art is astounding. Who needs to securely fasten your work to a wall when it’s guaranteed that even the bravest souls will think twice before attempting to steal it because it’s blinking at them. That’s definitely one painting I wouldn’t want hanging in my house. In fact with any luck, one day that candle will burn the whole lot down before it possesses someone or something equally awful.

Thank you for joining my quick tour of what’s hot in the Azerothian Art Scene!

Next time, I’ll be looking at the emerging new markets in places like Pandaria as well as how the destruction of Theramore is bound to produce some “classic”* paintings that haven’t been seen for hundreds of years so remember to tune in.

*You might wonder how I can be so sure about this, well it’s a long story involving Goblins, canvas scraps, pigments and a business philosophy which would do Mother Courage proud.

6 Responses

  1. Lylobean really looks like a successful and well dressed art thief. These are great, so many I haven’t ever seen before. I was just in Gilneas hunting art and how did I miss that spooky young lady!

    • I thought I was seeing things. I have an over-active imagination at the best of times and it gave me a horrible fright 😦

  2. Nice job on capturing all of those. They’re really interesting and the blinking one is kind of creepy.

    • Thanks. When caught out of the corner of your eye in the already deserted ruins of Gilneas, it’s more than “kind of creepy” though. When I tasked to windows to make sure I’d got the screenshots ok, I had to leave the building just in case. Think I’ve watched too many bad horror movies :p

  3. That is amazing! That Lylobean is one sneaky one. That blinking lady is so creepy that I need to go see it for myself!

    • Gnomes are well known for their sneakiness, it’s up there with our awesomely cuteness 😀

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